Monday, January 23, 2012

Rawwwwr! I'm a snow monster!!!

Song for this post: "Bad Kids" ~ Black Lips

Seattle Snowpocalypse 2012 is in remission (in most areas) and what do I have to show for it?

Well, the snow beast claimed 2 pairs of boots, gave me whiplash (via face-planting in cement after slipping on ice) and snowed me in for 2 days.

Snowpocalypse: 2
Boots: 0

I'd like to take a moment here to explain, once again, why snow here is so devastating to Seattle.  Most people mock us and accuse us all of being dramatic but really, that's not the case.

Seattle is a perfect combination of steep, inclined roads, moist air, rain, and tempuratures that are slightly above freezing in the winter. What does this mean for snow?  Well, when it snows, roads that are already dangerous become slides.  Then it warms up slightly and the snow turns to rain.  Then night comes and freezing tempuratures hit, turning that rain into sheets of solid black ice.  Now you have roads that are damn near a 45 degree angle that have been turned into a slip-n-slide.  The next day it snows again. Now the roads are deceiving. What looks like snow that might have potential traction is just a thin layer over aforementioned slip-n-slide.  Add in the moisture in the air because it's a sea coast and you get snow that turns in to crystals. So: snow + ice + inclined roads + crystalized snow = DISASTER.

This video is a perfect example. These are 4 wheel drive, heavy SUVs that are just plain, flat out, incapable of maneuvering here in Seattle.

So there. Piss off. We're not stupid over here.  It genuinely sucks in the snow.

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